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June 2012

1 post

"The Silent Ranks"

I wrote this piece as a commemorative speech, giving tribute to the women who marry into the military. Particularly the army. Who knows, dating a man whose first love is the military, maybe it’ll be me someday.. check it out! 

“I wear no uniforms, no blues or greens. But, I am in the military, in the ranks rarely seen.”

To the women who stand alone, who hold their heads high, who let the prideful tears silently but powerfully stain their cheeks. Who find themselves rolling over to an empty side of the bed. Who answer the question, “Where’s Daddy?” with tight smiles saying, “He’s being a hero.” For the women who are always praying that their hearts will remain intact while they stand on enemy lines. They are the silent ranks.

To the women who find camouflage comforting and Skype to be God’s greatest  gift to man. To the women who guard their hearts with iron cages of strength. To the women who give up their husbands for months to a world of unknowns. To the woman who tells her child she will pick them up at 1500 hours knowing that the child will expect her at three.  To those who find combat boots attractive and hear cadences in their dreams. They are the silent ranks.

To the women who long for their husband’s smile and fight against the commanding tears that threaten to take hold each and every day.  To the women who fear the “d” word; deployment could mean death. To the woman who remembers the jingle of her husband’s identification tags while they hang loosely from his neck, slicing the air with the constant reminder that he may need to be recognized when he can no longer utter words. They are the silent ranks.

“I am not the one who fires a weapon, who puts his life on the line. But my job is just as tough, I’m the one who is always left behind.”

To the women who fight for their composure when they see a couple walking through the grocery store holding hands or sneaking a smooch. To the women who long to hear their husband’s voices and envy those who grasp the rough hands of the men they love. To the women who never flinch at discussion of M4 weapons. To the women who find talk of tanks commonplace, rather than terrifying. To the women who understand the difference between officers and enlisted men. To the women who still refer to their husbands by first name when everyone else calls him by his last. To them he is a husband; to others he might just be a man in uniform. To the women who revere the red, white and blue. They are the silent ranks.

To the women who hear the whoosh of their American flags flying high with pride; wishing, waiting, wanting for their husbands to return. To the women who understand that units are families and respect the males who stand alongside the men they love and adore.  To the women who understand the meaning of serving. To the women who exemplify being “Army Strong.” They are the silent ranks.

“Behind the lines, I see things needed to keep this country free. My husband makes the sacrifice, but so do our kids and me.”

 To the woman who looks at her left hand at a diamond sparkling bright and misses the contours and etched lines of her husband’s hand holding her own. To the woman who hears the echo of her husband’s laughter as she stands watching her children play. She remembers the pushup punishment placed on her children when he was home. To the women who watch their children learn and grow without a husband by their side. To the women who watch their children outfit the pieces of uniform left behind, hitting the wall with the hard helmet, carrying the heavy rucksack, wanting to resemble their daddy in the photo they grasp. As the children carry the heavy bag, their mothers carry the heavy burden of their husbands being gone. To the women who must fill the shoes of both mother and father. They are the silent ranks.

According to National Public Radio, fifty or so percent of each military branch is married. 82 percent of males serve. So, to you 930,000 something women: Thank you for giving your spouse for us.

“I love the man I married. The military is his life. So I pledge to support my hero and stand among the silent ranks known as the military wife.”

http://www.scrapbook.com/poems/doc/2445/27.html

http://www.npr.org/2011/07/03/137536111/by-the-numbers-todays-military

Jun 12, 2012

May 2012

1 post

Beaver Inspiration

I have been incredibly lucky to call myself a Beaver and attend Buena Vista University, in Storm Lake, Iowa; not only because of the incredible education I am receiving, but because I have been exposed to life and the pursuit of greatness. When I began courses here, I had every intention of becoming a clinical psychologist. I wanted to help others; I knew that much. Little did I know that a public speaking course would impact my life forever. Dr. Bryan Kampbell, a professor of Communication, made me realize my talent and love for communicating. As I gave speech after speech, learned about ancient rhetoric, and became more familiar with the program, I knew it was my calling.

I am now a Communication Studies major with minors in both Sociology and Psychology. I couldn’t ask for anything more interesting, fulfilling, or impacting. Recently, I had the chance to go on a University service trip to Chicago, Illinois for an alternative spring break. Our goal was to help combat hunger and homelessness, and we did. However, we accomplished so much more. My life changed for the better on this trip. I knew little about the AWOL (A Week of Offsite Learning) program, and had no idea that I wanted to take a leap of faith and give my service. I have never been so confident that I went in the right direction. While we were in Chicago, we went to a place called By the Hand, an organization for inner city children that offers faith-based programming for them, in order to keep them off the streets. When I saw the love that each employee had invested in those children, I just knew that I needed to be there. I felt an emotional tug toward non-profit and I knew that the major I had chosen was the right one. I have never been so sure of something in my entire life. I wouldn’t have known it without the wonderful opportunities that Buena Vista University offers its students.

            My heart was absolutely tugged while in Chicago. I know now that money isn’t a factor in choosing a career path. I am positive that I will be led in the right direction and that everything will work itself out, as long as I am able to offer my service to a non-profit organization. We don’t always allow ourselves to be exposed to the bad in our society today. When I opened my eyes, I came to the realization that I am being called to help.

Our motto at BV is “Education for Service.” I exemplify this daily, being a part of our Student Senate, our Orientation Team, our tour guide group, Esprit de Corps, and many more. We are exposed to service every day at the University. I wouldn’t have been able to find the life I want to live if I wasn’t able to go to BVU. The faculty, staff, and students have been instrumental in making me the person I am today. 

This scholarship is sponsored by CenturyLinkQuote.com.

May 5, 20121 note

January 2012

1 post

Jan 13, 2012

December 2011

1 post

Dec 22, 2011

October 2011

1 post

“I am, a daughter, a sister, a grand-daughter, a niece, a cousin and a friend. A partner and a student. A young girl and a grown woman. I am confident and scared, terrified and excited. I am loving and caring and thoughtful and hopeful. I am sick and tired. I am shy and friendly and careful and careless. I am broken and whole. I am misunderstood, miguided and mislead. I am hardworking and determined, but a little scared on the inside. I wish on stars and dream my dreams. I pray to God and cry my tears. I smile on the ouside while im hurting on the inside. I listen to others who wont listen to me. I walk on eggshells and i walk on fire. I believe in passion and true love. I am everything and nothing all at once.” —Unknown
Oct 24, 20119 notes

September 2011

3 posts

Sep 29, 201130 notes
#Quotes #inspiration

It’s amazing how much college can take away from the things you love doing, ie. blogging! 

Anyway, this whole life thing… it’ll get you. Ever heard the saying, “Life’s a bitch, then you die” ? Some days I feel like there is no better explanation than that one. So many things get thrown at me in a day, and I hate being unenthusiastic in every aspect of my life. I love being known as the girl who constantly gives every ounce of happiness and heart to every situation she gets herself into! Some days though, it’s hard to put a smile on. It’s hard to feel like the world isn’t rough. It’s hard to see the positives. As much as I want to sit here and complain, however, I do know that so many people in this world are worse off than I happen to be. I have yet to lose someone near and dear to my heart suddenly. I have two amazing parents who love me with all of their being. I have an older sister who would do anything and everything to make me happy and keep me happy. I have another older sister, whom I fight with constantly (and am still currently fighting with), but still have her here on this Earth with me. I’m not alone. I’m never alone. I have fantastic friends who put a smile on my face just by being there. We have so many incredible factors that play into our existence. We complain, we whine, we cry - but why? It’s so difficult for me to think of the positives, but when I do, I realize how incredibly lucky I really am.

Life is about living. We can’t stand back and let everyone else continue on in their quest for happiness - we have to continue on our own journeys toward it as well. Recognize those things in your life that put a smile on your face. That allow you to be who you are. You’ll feel incredibly empowered and lucky when you do.

Sep 14, 20111 note
Reblog if you're against child abuse.

image

IF YOU DONT REBLOG, YOU DONT HAVE A HEART.

Sep 12, 2011120,003 notes

August 2011

5 posts

Aug 28, 20116 notes
#quotes #life
Aug 28, 20119,138 notes
#kushandwizdom #quote #quotes #backstabbers #believing #believe #liars #liars #heart #Heartbroke #break #relationship #Relationship Quotes #love quote #love quotes #life quote #life quotes
Aug 19, 201114 notes
#Typography #quotes #love #inspirational #airatotoot
Aug 19, 201120 notes
#quotes #text #words #sayings #words/quotes #phrase #polyvore
Aug 19, 201135,275 notes
#photography #writing

July 2011

3 posts

… I’m back!

I had a few things cross my mind this weekend, and what better way to convey my thoughts than through tumblr!

Why is it that everyone and their best friend always wants to know everything about a person, no matter how private the matter might be? I understand that we all want someone to confide in and sometimes we share things with people whom we think that we trust to hold our sometimes tough to bear secrets. Although, many people (and yes, I can be guilty of this often as well) feel the need to pry or want to know this information. I admire my best friend more than anyone in this entire world because she doesn’t ever feel the need to pry. She doesn’t care what decisions I make, who I want to be, as long as I keep room in my heart for her to be a part of my life. She’s a godsend, and I wouldn’t be me without her. Anyway, I guess I’m frustrated that I, along with many others, can’t seem to fight the gossip train. Being a private person, I don’t like to share many things about myself with others. It is hard for me to trust an individual enough to hold any personal knowledge of me that goes beyond the surface. I’ve been really thinking about who I’ve become in this last year, and who I really want to be in the years to come. Robert Brault said it better than anyone, “Never mind searching for who you are. Search for the person you aspire to be.” Everyone in life makes mistakes, feels regret and remorse, and has to fight some of those mistakes that continually haunt them. But don’t let them ruin the ideas you’ve developed for your future self. Don’t let life bring you down, instead work to put yourself on the next level. That gossip train? It’s trivial. Life if about so much more than talking about what so-and-so did on Saturday night, or who went to jail, or who made the latest mistake. I think I’m ready to put both feet forward and find who exactly the future Caitlin might be. I’m done being someone other people want me to be. I’m done doing what I don’t want to do. I’m done fighting to cover up my mistakes. I am me, and that won’t change. I’ve done things that I wish I hadn’t done. I’ve been a person I wish I hadn’t been. I, for one, won’t let that rule me any longer.

“There comes a time when you have to stand up and shout:
This is me damn it! I look the way I look, think the way I think, feel the way I feel, love the way I love! I am a whole complex package. Take me… or leave me. Accept me - or walk away! Do not try to make me feel like less of a person, just because I don’t fit your idea of who I should be and don’t try to change me to fit your mold. If I need to change, I alone will make that decision. When you are strong enough to love yourself 100%, good and bad - you will be amazed at the opportunities that life presents you.” - Stacey Charter

Now, the question remains…

Am I strong enough to love myself, a wholehearted one hundred percent?

I sure hope so.

Jul 31, 2011
“When the going gets tough, the tough get going.” —Unknown
Jul 20, 20111 note
Jul 19, 2011

June 2011

5 posts

Jun 24, 2011
Jun 16, 2011
Jun 15, 201110,892 notes

You all know me - when I start thinking, I immediately want to blog about it. Good thing you’re all here to read it and put up with me! ;)

Anyway, I got to thinking about how everyone always says that life is what we make it. Or life is what we want it to be. Essentially, it’s true. We control our destiny - no one else. Think about it.. you can really be whoever you want to be. No one can force you to avoid expression, or force you to be someone you’re not. Yes, you could give in to peer pressure or be someone you’re not to gain attention or fulfill someone elses’ wishes, but that’s a decision you have to be willing to make. It’s difficult to decide who you want to be. Everyone goes through those phases where life takes us by storm and the strong ‘you’ gets washed away.

It’s happened to me several times. I still don’t know exactly who I am, but I’m definitely living and learning.

Just don’t be afraid to try new things. To find what you’re good at. To avoid things you dislike. To show others your strong characteristics. To speak your mind. To be who you really want to be.

“To be nobody but yourself in a world which is doing its best, night and day, to make you everybody else means to fight the hardest battle which any human being can fight; and never stop fighting. ” {e.e. cummings, 1955}

Always fight. You owe it to yourself.

Jun 13, 2011
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